05 March 2026
When Julie Gelder and her husband, Col Gelder, first began their prostate cancer journey in 2020, they had no idea where to turn.
The couple, who have been together for around 15 years and married for almost 13 years, were living in regional Queensland when Col first experienced symptoms. What began as trouble going to the toilet soon led to a GP visit and a PSA test. At the time, Julie says they didn’t fully understand what the results meant.
After further tests and months of uncertainty, navigating the public health system, Col was eventually diagnosed with stage four metastatic prostate cancer. The news was devastating.
“We were shattered,” Julie recalled. “It was the fear of the unknown. I was afraid that he might die.”
For several months, the couple struggled to find clear answers about what would happen next. Living in Gladstone meant travelling long distances for specialist care, and the delays made an already frightening situation even harder.
Everything changed when they were introduced to a Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia (PCFA) Prostate Cancer Specialist Nurse while Col was in hospital.
“That’s how we found our beautiful Sally,” Julie said. “She ran us through everything. She explained what needed to happen and organised everything for us. She’s been amazing.”
With guidance from their care team and support from family and friends, Julie and Cole gradually found their footing again. Julie became Col’s strongest advocate, attending every appointment and helping him navigate treatment decisions.
“Half the time he doesn’t understand what the specialists are explaining,” she said. “But I’m proactive, so I make sure we get the information we need.”
For Julie, having her own support network was just as important. She leaned on her daughters, sisters and close friends to help her process the emotional toll of caring for a loved one with cancer.
“I could step away and talk to them about how I truly felt,” she said. “That support network has been the best thing for me.”
Julie also discovered the value of connecting with others affected by prostate cancer through peer support groups.
The couple travelled from Gladstone to Bundaberg to attend meetings where they could talk with others who understood their experience.
Those conversations made a lasting difference.
“Reach out and see who the support people are around you because you’re not on your own,” Julie said.
Today, PCFA offers a wide range of peer support groups across Australia, including groups designed for specific communities.
These include groups for men living with advanced prostate cancer, culturally and linguistically diverse communities, gay and bisexual men, partners and carers, and younger men under 50.
“PCFA has a range of prostate cancer peer support groups established for partners," said Louise Thomson, PCFA Support Group & Administration Coordinator.
“Many partners of regular Prostate Cancer Support Groups catch up on their own to discuss how things are going, and to lean on each other for support.
"Prostate cancer affects the whole family, so it's important to make sure they know they're not alone in this fight, too."
For Julie, knowing that support is always available has made the journey more manageable.
Her message to others facing prostate cancer is simple: you don’t have to face it alone.
“Don’t be afraid to reach out,” she said. “Everyone in the organisation is supportive, friendly and helpful. It’s not a scary process.”
For more information about prostate cancer, or to find a support group, visit www.prostate.org.au or phone 1800 22 00 99 to speak with a Prostate Cancer Specialist Nurse.
